Archive for the ‘humour’ Category

Thou Shall Not Covet…….

Thursday, August 25th, 2011

I’m not terribly religious…..in fact not at all really. But I am aware by way of popular TV and movie culture of the commandments passed down to Charlton Heston, specifically the 10th one, ‘Thou Shall Not Covet’.

 

However, seeing this at a friends place when I went for dinner the other weekend, I must confess to a brief passing moment when I was trying to work out how I could get it out of the house without being seen/noticed.

 

I want I want I want……

pills ?...... pills ?.......cigarettes ?.........

iPad 2 For Dad…….

Monday, May 23rd, 2011

According to an email I just received from Apple, an ‘iPad2 makes an ideal gift for fathers day’

I suspect if I gave one to my father, he would stare at it with a confused look and eventually use it to prop up something around the house !

Nice try Apple, but no sell on that front I’m afraid.

Liquorice Pig…….

Friday, May 13th, 2011

Gaaaaaahhhhh !!

Owing to my stressy workloads and total lack of will power, I have just consume an entire 215g bag of Bassetts Liquorice Allsorts by myself :o(

Curse you Trebor (are they still owned by Trebor ??)

p.s. Seems thet are now owned by Cadburys

p.p.s What happened to the tasty little blue Bertie sweetie that used to be in the bag ?

A New Taxonomy For Queens…….

Monday, September 27th, 2010

Reproduced with the kind permission of Hotpants of Kennington, who came up with the idea while out one night dancing…….clearly the music and the boys must have been very dull indeed !


All queens can be described by two adjectives, each of which describes their position on one or other axis of a two dimensional space.

The first adjective or dimension describes how well they carry it off. This is the Glamour dimension and ranges from Tragic to Diva.

The second adjective or dimension describes their attitude towards themselves. This is the Me scale and ranges from Painfully Modest to Totally Self-absorbed.

The two dimensional space created by these two axes can then be segmented into four quadrants by dividing each axis into two halves – Low and High. So we have…

High Glamour & High Me :

True Divas – we worship these people & with good reason. They are rare, but utterly fabulous.

Low Glamour & High Me :

Tragic Self-absorbed Queens – usually young & prissy with too much make-up & too many accessories. Sometimes they grow up & get over themselves, but more often they get hit by a bus because they aren’t paying attention.

High Glamour & Low Me :

Unassuming Adonises – hot, gorgeous, sexy & interesting in conversation, but at the same time endearingly down to earth. Ple-e-e-ease be my boyfriend…

Low Glamour & Low Me :

The Masses – most of us. Go out, get smashed, have a laugh & deal with the consequences tomorrow.

Bruce babe, you are a genius ;oD

Photo: GETTY IMAGES

Explaining sexuality Using iPod

Thursday, May 13th, 2010

Had to laugh at this one, possibly it will get a few parents off the hook having to have *that* akward conversation with their kids :o)